PAMPER PARTY FOR ONE?

So have had a good think about planning ahead with your children?  But what about you?

When was the last time you had some really good time with yourself? - I know we played a little at the weekend - and your stories made me smile, cringe in recognition and laugh out loud, but where are the strategies that make it easy to carve out some "Me time"

Let me share what Mrs Big does - she has a pretty basket on a shelf outside our bathroom.  Over the week she lays a freshly laundered towel there, selects a beautifully scented candle, a book that she would like to read, various lotions and potions in sachets (she saves them from magazines too) and of course I am charged with returning home with any half-used hotel toiletries that she can pamper herself with.

At some point in her crazy week, she pours herself a glass of sparkling mineral water into one of the crystal goblets we got as a wedding gift - and takes herself into the bathroom for a pamper party for one.  Although if I've been good I am sometimes invited to join her for a visit.

Everyone knows - when the shelf is empty, Momma's having herself a spa session - do not disturb!. More importantly she feels that she can prepare through the week for some special time and take it just for her, its a system that works to help remind her that "When Mum's happy - most everybody's happy!"

So what systems can you put in place that allow you to take your rightful place at the center of the universe that is  your family?

Remember its all about balance.

Mr Big

HANDS UP WHOS GOT KIDS THEN?

I have – have you?

Do you remember the day they were born – when you looked into those perfect newborn eyes and swore you would protect and cherish them forever?  And they looked at you – and you fell in love, and life would never ever be the same again.

When was the last time you and your child shared that look – the one that says, “you are the centre of my universe and I made a promise to always cherish you”?

Somehow, in the busy-ness  of life we forget to create those moments for our children, we get caught up in the school runs, clean laundry, soccer practice, homework, music recitals, dance class, horse riding mayhem – and simply forget to BE with our children.

Memorygirl has a son that’s 10.  She told me today that she wants to make sure that time with his is scheduled and honoured, because she feels that realistically she’s got about 4 years of weekends before he spreads his wings and needs to “hang out with the guys” in his transition to manhood. 

One great thing she does is have a family adventure day every weekend – where they hang out together and do stuff at the beach, in the mountains, by the lochs (is that right??  Memorygirl told me today that Scotland doesn’t have any lakes, it’s got these instead?)

She wants a simple strategy to remind herself through the week to create “adventures” for her boy in advance rather than hit the weekend with no surprises.  So here’s what we did;

She popped out to a thrift store and bought a large clear glass vase – and in that vase she places 208 marbles ( 4 years x 52 weekends). That vase now sits on top of her desk next to her computer – a daily reminder of why she is doing this work with me and where her priorities lie. Every time they have an adventure day she will remove one marble to keep her goal in her consciousness.

So what simple reminder can you create to prompt you to remember that:

“The people you are working for are waiting for you at home”

Mr Big

If she is quiet tonight then be kind.  I think realising how few special days she has left with her boy really hit home how transient childhood is for him.  In fact we both shed a few tears.

THE GOLDEN ROLODEX CHALLENGE

READY TO START BUILDING YOUR BRAND?

Yup!! That’s right, before you even start building a business (or manifesting your dream life) you need to get real about who you are as a brand.

You have unique talents, quirks and strengths – and part of this process is to let you have some magical Aha! moments about yourself.

But lets not kid ourselves here dudes.  Sometimes the birthing process of a new business or a new life is down to pen to paper, start at the beginning and work through to the end stuff.  Foundations that have to be there before you can start building something spectacular.

One of the most important pieces of advice I was ever given as a business builder was that it’s more about farming than it is about hunting.  Tonight you start the ongoing process of building a rolodex of relationships that your are going to nurture and support and that will eventually blossom into fabulous business generating fruit – and you will do it all, by doing what we do best – building and maintaining personal relationships, not by rushing in for the sale.

Grab a notepad and a pen and start creating a list of at least 250 people that you know well enough to pick up the phone and tell them that you have decided to start doing business in a different way.

Think of the people you already do business with?

Think of the people you would like to do business with?

Who makes money when you make money?

Who can you pass business to you?

Who can pass you business?

Who do you just plain like?

Who motivates and stimulates you?

Who is already working in a field you want to get into?

Who is your biggest competitor?

Get creative as to who is on your list.  The coffee dude at our local café was on mine, as was the copier guy, the water cooler guy and the parking attendant for our covered car park.

Between them they have currently referred me over $750,000 of business in the last 10 years – and although they have all moved on in their lives, we are still in touch and we still generate business together

And if you think that 250 people is too much – can I just point out that you already have a golden Rolodex of 100 people on this very blog.  Here are motivated positive people who are going to want o help you build your business if they only knew the most useful way to do so.

So here is another challenge that is going to take you a few days to complete – 250 names in a list in, well shall we say 3 days?

Trust me, I will be back

Mr Big

YOUR SUCCESS HABIT 1 - PLAY

Hello my British friends

A short challenge this evening to let you enjoy the last of your fun-filled weekend.

So did you play?  Did you discover that it doesn’t take hours of preparation and lots of money to create moments of joy in your life?

To be truly creative in your life – you need to reconnect with that child-like part of yourself that still sees the “infinite possibilities” – so the first part of tailoring a truly exceptional life made to fit the real you is to take time to play.

So grab your diary and schedule some play-dates with yourself – I need you to make at least 7 to start creating a new habit – and here’s the important thing.  When the busy stuff of life shows up, I need you to honour these dates with yourself as a priority. 

Your kids need you to ferry them to the mall- sorry I have a appointment.  Your boss springs a last minute project on you – sorry I have commitments.  Your partner calls late to ask you to pack in another errand – sorry I won’t have time I have somewhere to be.

YOU – and the life you are slowly gestating are the priority for these small chunks of time.  I’m not saying neglect your family – what I am saying is don’t neglect yourself.

Get that pen and do it now.

I will be back

Mr Big

YOUR WEEKEND CHALLENGE

Are you having some fun yet?

So did you identify any moments of joy?  Take a break now for a couple of days and see how many of these moments you are prompted to experience.

Take some time to play as a child again, visit the beach, or the pool.  Buy a copy of a treasured childhood book and indulge in some sleepy afternoon reading.  Eat two deserts instead of your vegetables. Take some children and go fly a kite …………………….. what will your weekend adventure be?

Enjoy your weekend – I will be back on Sunday to set you some challenges for the week ahead.

Mr Big

THE WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP CHALLENGE

Over the last few days I’ve had you looking forward a little and imagining what your perfect future could be, be let me ask you a rather revealing question.

What did you want to be when you grew up?

Now you could chicken out of this exercise and give me a stock answer, “a nurse” “ a fire-fighter” an  “astronaut” – or you could use this as a reflective tool to think back and find out what made you passionate as a kid. But don’t worry this isn’t about resigning from your current job and running off to join the circus.

What was it that propelled you from your bed in the early hours at weekends ready to play all day until you fell into your bed at night and slept a deep fulfilling and refreshing sleep?

Yes this exercise is about finding out what really “makes your heart sing” – those things you did as a child that you instinctively knew were good for your soul to do. It’s about stripping back the artifices of our daily “Grown-up” life and finding those little connections to moments of joy.

Did you love to ride your bike – freewheeling down hills with the wind in your hair?? I did, I still do on occasion – but with significantly less hairJ.  Did you love the feeling of plunging into a cool blue pool on a hot day? What about wrapping up in a blanket and spending a rainy afternoon in a tent?  Flying a kite? Fishing with grandpa. Picnics on the beach? Building snowmen in the yard?

What were your favourite activities as a child?  What could you do best that no-one else could do?  Where did you excel?  What did you dream of?  More importantly – when did you stop dreaming?

Think back to when you were a kid – and life was all about infinite possibilities, and hold onto that feeling.

Memorygirl remembered that she used to create plays in her back garden for her parents and the local kids – I don’t think it was a coincidence that she ended up as a West End stage manager. 

She also remembers hours and hours spent drawing and painting –and although she tells me “she colours in for a living”, essentially that’s indeed what her beautiful mind maps are.

So dig back into your memories – and find out what those precious touchstones were, and maybe even start a plan to reintroduce them into your life.

After all the occasional “stolen moment” eating an ice-cream or a handful of jelly beans, sitting in your suit, in the sun before a meeting is a wonderful way to create a little joy into your life.  I know – I ate the ice cream yesterday – and I will again in the future.

So what are going to be your moments of joy in the future?

After all it’s never to late to have a second childhood.

Mr Big

THE RESPECT YOUR MONEY CHALLENGE

Do you respect your money?  The money that actually moves through your hands?

Here’s a little periodic trick that I play with myself when I need to concentrate on appreciating the flow of money through my life

I promise you that this will take minutes this evening to do – but pay attention to how it gently changes your attitude towards money over the next few weeks.

First I need you to get up and go and fetch you purse or wallet or whatever you use on a day-to-day basis that holds your money – and your plastic money too.

Are you back with me yet??

Now I need you to tip everything – and I mean absolutely everything contained in your wallet out onto the table in front of you.

Now ditch the old receipts, the travel ticket stubs, the chewing gum wrappers – all the crappy stuff that has accumulated over the weeks and months since you have acquired your wallet.

Replace any of your “folding stuff” – all the faces facing the same was, high notes to small ones and put back in to your wallet neatly, the same with your travel-card, donor card, library card, ID cards, staff passes, drivers licence, right up to the plastic money that we can all use with gay abandon at times.

So now your money lives in a newly decluttered environment – you have space to see and to appreciate what you have financially.  You have a breathing space to consider when spending before you open your newly organised wallet and make a rational and conscious decision to purchase rather than a knee-jerk one.

Does that makes you feel better, more in control and organised?  Why not really for it tonight and declutter your working bag or briefcase too.

The feng-shui of wallets – we could be onto a winner here J

Mr Big